Reciprocity

You don’t dislike gays.

No, you don’t genuinely loathe my kind. Rather, you fear us because we don’t play by your rules.

Oh!, and by the way? Vice-versa.

 

Exist Solely to Fornicate

This morning in a local Trader Joe’s I saw a fortysomething, manly Sikh Lite. The customary thingamabob that one expects to see atop the head of a Sikh seemed to have been an improvisation borne of a stretchy beanie.

There’s no way that such reservedly handsome men could be bad in the sack. No way at all!

Strawberry Bitch Hair

When I look at his neck and his face and his hair, I think to myself “Oversized Q-tip adorned with golden feces.” And to think that he’s got the personality to match!

 

R.I.P.

1953 — 1973

The American middle class lived very well and created middlemediocrity

Messing with hippies

There’s a store in Berkeley called Berkeley Bowl like it’s a bowling alley. They sell things in bulk like dates which are gross like eating a grub made of Elmer’s paste. I want to go in there and buy three pounds and then put it back in the bin. Then when inventory is finished they’ll have too much so the cashier will get fired ha ha so she can’t feed any of her medical marijuana babies oh well!

hello i’m new here

I’m a nice person. Or I’m Mommie Douchest. Sometimes I’m in the middle.